Sunday Scaries is a weekly newsletter from Katina M., the writer behind On Adulting + co-founder of Daydreamers. Think of it as a dose of conscious thinking for your days ahead; like a cozy sweater to wrap your thoughts in.
Hey hey friends,
Happy Sunday ‘eve :) How have you been feeling this week? What’s new?
Here’s some stuff that’s been circling around my brain: I’m in my last set of classes for my Master’s program (I know I haven’t shared much on that but TLDR - I’m nearly done with my Master’s in Clinical Psychology @ Columbia in the Mind-Body Institute; most amazing/fascinating program ever). A lot of my work this semester is focused on emotions - understanding what they mean, where they come from, and what they can tell us in our everyday lives.
What’s been bubbling up to the surface for me this week is this - emotions are solely based on our perception. In not-so-scientific terms…they’re kind of made up. Not like, made up made up as in they’re fake - but they’re in a way, figments of our imagination.
To me, that’s a liberating concept.
I really liked this comparison: Emotions, in a way, are like colors. We see + experience them differently based on our past experiences, what we’ve been taught, and the fractions of “light” in that current moment. They’re subjective clues that inform a lot of our own understanding about ourselves + the world. They aren’t concrete, so they can never be wrong.
When I learned this, my logical brain was super confused. And kind of annoyed - I’ve spent so much of my life understanding + reflecting on + parsing through my emotions so…what the heck?! We’re not even able to develop a clear, consistent scientifically-proven definition of what they are? We don’t have a universal meaning for anger? Sadness? Fear? Love?
But then, my intuitive, free brain started to roam. I allowed myself to be transported between different memories of love - for myself, D, a place, a moment. Each so different and unique. I did the same for other emotions on the tip of my tongue. And then, I sat back - sort of satisfied.
How freakin’ cool is it that our emotions shift + change as we do? As our understanding of the human experience expands, so does our pallette of emotions?
Something to noodle on + mull over + maybe allow yourself to explore this week. Here’s to liberating our feelings :)
See you on the other side,
K
A phrase to think on:
My feelings are just giving me clues as to how I am showing up in the current moment.
What that means: Weirdly enough, psychological + cognitive researchers have not come up with a clear-cut definition of individual emotions. While yes, emotional experiences can be grouped into categories, we cannot fully prove that [XYZ] defines feeling “frustrated” for every single human on earth. Interesting when you think about it that way, huh? So, we can expand our associations or categories of emotions as we live more life and collect more conscious experiences. Here’s a not-so-nerdy read on feelings.
How you can experiment with it: Keep track of how many different versions of “love” (or boredom, or exhaustion, or joy) you experience this week. Where are you when it bubbles up? What does it do to your body? Thoughts? What impact does it have on your perspective + actions afterward? Keeping a log of an emotional category is a fascinating + mindful way to expand your feelings ‘pallette.’
Stuff I’m into RN
This fascinating read about fresh air as an office ‘amenity’. I’ve been personally really interesting in the concept of what ‘fresh air’ means lately (and also this seemingly-silly-but-fascinating thought question about oxygen’s impact on aging) and I thought this article was really eye-opening. Did you know that air quality directly impacts cognitive functioning? In an airborne pandemic + ever-changing climate, these “basic” questions are ones we need to be asking.
Sustainable, reusable eye masks? Count me in. I feel my *almost 30* nature is really becoming clear. That OR all of us have collectively allowed our inner-grandma to shine through. I’ve definitely been influenced by all the ladies on my Tiktok speaking into the camera with cool eye masks on but am I the only one who was like…$30 for 3 wears? When I found Dieux I was sold; use your own serum + it absorbs straight in! I wear them (and my retainers) every night.
This SF store that I want to live in. Okay friends, whether you live in the Bay Area or are ever visiting this romantic little city you must make a pit-stop at The Perish Trust (and the most magical bread place ever next door, The Mill). D + I went on a little adventure date this past weekend and stumbled upon this store - and wowow it’s perfection. It reminded us of a little ceramic/home store we loved in Tokyo. Their website is a little sneak-peak.
Also P.S. Did you know that stores in SF take…lunch breaks? As in…they close their stores from 1-2pm (even on weekends!) and write cute little signs that say “out to lunch, be back soon”?! Reminder that we should *all* be taking lunch breaks + coffee breaks + breathing breaks more often.
I love you + thank you + I can’t wait to *see* you next week.
If you’re into it, share this note with a friend. We all need a little word-hug.